Moody...

Memorial Day has definitely been that. As is evident by the above picture, the weather has been a bit moody today. We had a couple of sprinklings of rain, but no cloud busters. On that count it was disappointing. The gray atmosphere out there wasn't though. I dig that.

Before I get to what I consider to be a beautiful day weather wise, I was feeling 'off'. Not under the weather, or wonky...over reactionary. I know I'm only 45, but I've suspected for about the last year that I've been gradually entering into my 'change'. I haven't gotten the official diagnosis from a doctor, but my hormones are telling me it's underway. There were a couple of instances today that are prime examples of what I'm talking about. The first was a burst of anger. I was really mad all of a sudden. Everything was pissing me off and I didn't know why. I was washing dishes and was mad at the dishes. Silly things like that. It started to subside a bit, but I decided to go out for a walk along one of my usual routes to try to unwind the rest of the way. Taking pictures is one of my most effective stress relievers. So I grab my tennis shoes and some socks, grab the camera, get some fresh batteries out of the fridge, and balancing all of it in my arms I head for the living room. I'm just about to leave the kitchen when I sense the collection of things I'm carrying go off balance. I'm fumbling trying to keep a grasp on everything and BAM! the camera falls to the floor. The tile kitchen floor. I'm freaking out. I quickly pick it up and race into the living room in a panic. The batteries in it are dead, so new ones have to be loaded before we can find out if it's working. Glenn handles it because, as I said, I'm freaking out. It turns on, but the zoom doesn't work. I feel myself entering into the realm of a nervous breakdown over this. What?! What the hell is going on? I even say to Glenn that I feel like I'm about to lose it and I have no idea why. It wasn't like me. At all. Sure, it was absolutely upsetting that the camera might be broken, but I didn't need to pop a blood vessel. Glenn and i fiddled with it a bit and found that the zoom switch would work if you used a certain touch with it. Suspect it only needs a small adjustment. This had me feeling a bit better. Since the camera was functional I decided to still head out for my walk. Decompression was a must.

The entire day had been overcast in varying degrees. I ventured up to the Kroger to get a few things around 4:00 and I wouldn't say the sky was angry, but slightly peeved. By the time I came out the sprinkling had begun. As evening approached the dim gray of inclement weather swirled closer. It was on the verge of dusk by the time I left for my walk. The clouds over the marshes were thick and swirling. A lot of beautiful patterns and textures happening that were made more interesting by various levels of light pushing through. I snapped a number of cloud pictures. The truly angry and brooding pictures came as it got darker. As the decreasing light and increasing clouds cast the trees into silhouette. It was all so relaxing and inspiring. It definitely sparked the creative corners of my brain. For awhile I've been toying with the idea of starting an online writing project. Create another blog and post new chapters to a story each week. There are some pictures from a few previous walks and some from this walk that have spawned different ideas that all kind of relate to one another. It's feeling like they're all starting to coalesce. At this point I'm still just toying with the idea though.

Geez, it's 4:01 in the A.M. Hopefully I'll conk out for a bit sometime soon. This up all night deal really blows...